My dad tried these out.

1. Put it through the wash. (In his defense, this one was an accident.)
2. Dip it in a curry pan. (That was actually my fault.)
3. Wash the curry off. Decide it doesn’t smell right. Put dish soap on it and wash it again.
4. Fry it on the woodstove in an attempt to dry it off. Don’t catch it on fire; that’s a bad idea.
5. When it’s finally dry, restore it to its original position – in your pocket – so it can go through the laundry again.