Alright… so where do I begin? At the good part? That seems reasonable. Okay, so first, someone brought out the belt for my teacher, and presented it to him (4th Dan, Expert!) and I about burst smiling. Seriously, I thought I would start laughing from sheer joy. I don’t think anyone would understand this. Just me, maybe. Anyway, after that, the assistant teacher (who’s absolutely awesome, btw) got his, and the teacher’s son got his 2nd Dan, and through all this I was grinning from ear to ear because I was so proud of everybody else, and myself as well, I think, and then I got called up, and he tied the black belt on me, and I think all the laughter that was trying to get out through my mouth got out through my eyes instead. Almost. I didn’t quite let it. I wasn’t so caught up in the moment that I would do anything. (That one sentence, I just realized, was a horrible run-on. And I don’t care. Pssh.) That would have been ridiculously embarrassing, and way too girly, and I wouldn’t do it in front of everyone for anything. But still, I didn’t realize I did that sort of thing. What if I end up crying at my wedding? Lots of women do. How scary. I’ll have to be careful about that.
Anyway, it was incredible. And then Kevin called after I got back, and life was even more incredible. And I’m very happy right now. HAPPY! Do you understand? I’m happy. (BTW. when you think about it, ‘happy’ is such a funny word. Just try saying it over and over again.)
And BTW, I went to a huge bookstore and got three used books. I think I like used books better than old books.
I can’t believe how much things have changed. And yes, some of it sucked at first, but now… wow. So much is different. A year ago, I would have hoped for this, and imagined it, but never expected it. A year and a half ago I would have thought it was impossible. Two years ago I would have laughed in its face. Three years ago I wouldn’t even have acknowledged its existence. Now its here. And you know something? I think its going to get better.